ok so my little brother brandon is the reason i picked up this book – he totally digs this guy, especially the story “an occurrence at owl creek bridge”. and since my bro has good taste, i figured i’d give this author a shot.

so i went through the titles they had at barnes and noble, and i figured go big or go home, i’d get his complete works! i don’t think there’s an author out there i’ve read all of outside of jim davis’ garfield books so it’d be kinda cool to say i’d read every single short story this dude has written!

and with that i give you my book report!

hearts and laserbeams book report: the complete short stories of ambrose bierce by ambrose bierce

SNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i could end my book report right there, but that may not be quite informative enough… so here we go –

this guy is cool, i will give him that – check out this pic:

image from http://bierce.thefreelibrary.com/

dig that ‘stache!! no wonder my brother likes this dude – he’s got kinda a mark twainy feel about him. (another favorite author of el brando)

ok so on to the actual book – this book is split into 3 parts: part 1, bierce’s horror stories. part 2, his war stories. part 3, his tall tales.

the best thing about old-timey horror stories is that they’re nothing like today’s scary crap! can’t handle the hostels, the saw 1-2-3-4-however many of em there ares, the snakes on a planes? make way for the horror stylings of ambrose bierce, where every story reads like this!

“ok there was guy, see? and he was travelling through the woods one night – and he meets this mysterious stranger, and they start talking and it’s just kinda strange! and then after they part ways and he gets where he’s going, he later finds out HE WAS TALKING TO A GHOST!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!”
(that’s my scary ghost noise)

i gave this book a shot, i really did, but MAN this book could not hold my interest! and so, after my valientest of efforts, i gave in an gave up on this book about 119 pages into it. (it’s 496 pages long).

so uh… i guess i don’t really have anything else to say about it! lemme know if you wanna give ol’ biercey a try and i’ll send you my copy, maybe you’ll fare better with it! first come first served! (remember i post my blog on a bunch of different sites, so be quick if ya want this book!)

ratings:
hearts: 2 heart – i am pretty sure this guy had a formula and it seemed to work for him cuz he wrote a ton of short stories!
farts: 3 farts – but MAN i could just not get into it!