I’ll be super honest with you guys – I didn’t watch the Oscars last night.

The awards show has become pretty irrelevant in my life in the past few years, as it gets harder and harder and harder to A) leave the house to see a movie and B) stay awake during the movies I watch at home. I think I’ve seen exactly zero of this year’s Oscar contenders. Which is fairly impressive in itself. But I did watch the full series of Alias last year, so I got that going for me…

That I didn’t watch the Oscars doesn’t change the fact that I love a great Oscar red carpet gown. The morning after, I’m all over the internet looking for my favorite dresses from the night. Here’s some of my faves from this year; I know you’re gonna wanna chime in with your own picks for best dressed in the comments!

Jennifer Lopez’s dress was amazing – just totally gorgeous. But I feel bad for anyone that had to sit next to her on the left or right in the theater, because that skirt was so floaty and full it probably took up at least one or two seats on either side.

There were things I loved about Chloe Grace Moretz’s dress and things I didn’t… I’m a huge fan of pockets in dresses, but I’m not into the print on this. I think if I was heading to something like the Oscars, I’d be looking for a print that was a little happier.

Reese Witherspoon’s dress was so classic glam – sleek and stylish and one of my favorite Oscar red carpet fashions.

I’ll be honest – the back of Marion Cotillard’s white Oscar gown… the way it’s gathered in back reminds me of drapes, and not in a good Gone with the Wind way. Props to Rosamund Pike for finding a dress the exact shade of the Oscar red carpet! When I saw it… Not gonna lie – it almost looked like the entire red carpet was part of her dress, like she was kind of emerging from the carpet all Terminator 2 liquid metal style:

I mean that in the best of ways. If there is a best of ways for saying someone came to the Oscar red carpet looking like the T-1000 from Terminator 2.

I love Oscar gowns with unexpected details like this, but it always begs the question… How do you sit down in that thing?

Better to wear your amazing couture embellishment on your sleeve, so you can fit in your seat in the theater. Plus, if you have a cold, you can just turn your head to the left, bury your face in your huge shoulder flower and pretend like you’re smelling it for comedy, but really you’re discreetly wiping your nose.

Someone find out if Gwenyth Paltrow had a cold last night. And if she left magic nose goblins on her dress. Because if yes, she’s my hero.

I’m a sucker for a great pair of glasses. Hey Christian Hebel, get off your phone. You’re at the freaking Oscars, literally no one’s doing something better in your Facebook timeline.

FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) is real, people. Even for celebrities.

She’s a brick…. HOWSE. I love the pattern on this dress. It feels modern and special and a little edgy. Is this a hand painted design, or a photoshopped texture of bricks, anyone want to venture a guess?

What’s your thoughts on appliques on evening gowns? It’s never been my thing – it always feels kind of fake and costumey if that makes sense. If I was picking Oscar dresses, I’d agree with my stylist that this is pretty stunning, but it’s kind of too over the top for me in terms of beads and appliques. Katie Cassidy pulls it off well, though.

Three cheers to Gina Rodriguez for rocking a gorgeous jewel toned gown. I am in serious heart with this color.

I can’t even with Lupita Nyong’o’s dress. The pearl details are totally over the top amazing. Love love love it.

This was the exact minute I thought to myself “I think I need to dye my hair again”.

I haven’t dyed it in a while – I don’t know how this happened, but somewhere along the line since having Joy, my hair darkened up again and its natural color is now a pretty dark brown. I dig it – I used to dye it because it was this really dull medium brown, and the various shades of red (and hot pink and crayon red and black) that I’ve used since I was about 19 or so have just felt like a much better fit for my personality. But this dark brown, I’ve been digging it.

But I’ll be honest – there’s a box of red dye under the bathroom counter and it’s calling my name very strongly today.

Also, I love it when people don’t realize I’ve been dying my hair for 20 years, and they project my hair dye onto my kids. Like I’ll get comments sometimes about how Joy’s hair looks strawberry blonde in certain lights and “she’s got a little of muhmuh’s red hair”. Nope, guys, sorry. Muhmuh’s red hair is from a box.

But let’s get back to dresses.

Dear Hollywood, please eat something. Please. I promise you, eating lots of snacks is really fun. You could make your snacks lots of healthy snacks, just send the ice cream my way. And the cookies. And nachos. And pizza.

Was anyone else expecting something a little more unusual from Lady Gaga? One of the reasons I love love love her style is she’s always pushing the envelope.

Two words. Meat dress.

But this felt so tame. So really tame. The gloves are a nice punch… but not quite Gaga enough for me.

And maybe that’s where she was being really unexpected and Lady Gaga… by wearing something much more toned down – to keep us all on our toes?

What was your favorite Oscar red carpet look?

Did we forget one of the best dresses, and what totally missed the mark for you?